


The Most Desperate Desires of the Heart

by tonithekidd505



Category: Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them (Movies), Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Fandom, Fantastic Beasts, Friends to Lovers, Harry Potter - Freeform, Light Angst, M/M, again ill try, also fuck jkr, bc im a sucker for jude and johnny, grindeldore battle, i will try, idk if ill write smut, they are slightly younger than the movies, they will get there, to enemies, to lovers again?, we don't stan no transphobes in this house, what i think happened
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-21
Updated: 2020-09-21
Packaged: 2021-03-08 01:40:41
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 2,339
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26577718
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tonithekidd505/pseuds/tonithekidd505
Summary: My take on what happened during the legendary battle and what probably followed next.
Relationships: Albus Dumbledore/Gellert Grindelwald
Comments: 1
Kudos: 30





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> hey <3  
> Just a heads up before you start reading xx  
> In this fic both Albus and Gellert are a bit younger than the films portray them (more in their early 30s)  
> The blood pact has been destroyed, hence their ability to fight each other  
> They are just two idiots trying to suppress their homoromantic feels :)

The heavy smell of smoke filled the air around them, sitting like a lump in their throats. Tina and Newt were fighting shoulder to shoulder, dodging unforgivable curses and casting spells whenever they could. Ruins and bodies surrounded them from all sides, the fog making it almost impossible to recognize friend from enemy.

Everywhere around them voices and cries were muffled into the dreadful noise of a battle that would later go down in history. The smell was sickening, the taste of burnt flesh leaving its bitterness to linger in their mouths. They were outnumbered, exhausted and in desperate need of someone to rescue them.

It was at that moment that a series of bright red flames split the starlit sky in half, when the familiar shape of a great crimson and gold bird made its way towards the center of the ancient temple they’d been fighting in and landed on the shoulder of a tall man.

 ** _“Enough”_** _,_ his deep voice filled the air and Newt felt his body go numb from head to toe. He watched in awe as everything else around him went still, from the dark haired witch whose wand was pointing straight to his heart, to the pieces of ash left behind by the pheonix.

Dumbledore’s voice made its way to his ears once more, “It is me that you want, let them walk away.”

He was standing at the very center of the room, but something was off. He was in the middle of a battlefield, yet his wand was held loosely beside him, as if he had no intention of using it.

A slow clapping, followed by a menacing laugh, and Grindelwald’s slim figure was seen swaying through the frozen crowd.

“I should have expected that from you. Arriving last minute, acting like a hero when everyone is weak and worn out, only to take all the credit. I can already see it: ‘Albus Dumbledore Defeats Evil Wizard’. A cliche, even for you, wouldn't you say?”

Even though his voice was dripping with sarcasm, the rage in his eyes betrayed his false calmness.

“Don’t do this, there are other ways of achieving the Greater Good. There is still time for you to turn around.” _Please._

“Are you asking me to _repent_? That’s too pathetic, even for you.”

The two wizards were walking around in a wide circle, pace slow and wands on the ready.

“You speak of peace and then you start a war, Gellert. That is not how it’s supposed to be.” Dumbledore’s face seemed tired, weathered and as vulnerable as a man’s could be, but his voice was as calm as ever.

“Don’t you dare call me a hypocrite! You preach unity and honesty while living a life in hiding and terror. The master manipulator. Look around you, all these people-wizards!- lost. So much magical blood spent- and where were you? Take a look at the great Dumbledore, everyone!”, he spin around with open arms. “I bet you can’t even look at yourself in the mirror, can you?”

They had stopped pacing and now stood face to face, at arm’s length from one another.

“The sight of who you have become makes me sick.” To the onlookers, his gaze could have easily been mistaken as that of genuine hatred.

With Grindelwald’s wand now seconds away from casting the first spell, Dumbledore tried his luck one last time.

“Do not make us do this.” That was a whisper for only the two of them to hear.

It was impossible to detect which one of the wizards cast the first spell. Red, silver and yellow- never green- sparks filled the air once again, the two men fighting as if their lives were at stake.

Words were spoken, pleadings were made and the battle kept on.

One swing from Grindelwald, another from Dumbledore in return.

It looked as if it was never going to end, both men fighting with equal rage and skill, when a red string of magic came out of the latter’s wand and disarmed his opponent, making him fall on his back.

What followed next made no sense to Newt, at least not at that moment.

Dumbledore lifted the blonde man’s face with his fingers, bend down to grab him by the arm and they both vanished into thin air.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> enjoy :)

It took a surprising long time for Gellert to come back to his senses.

The sudden change of scenery along with the unmistakable nausea of side-along apparition made him lose track of his whereabouts.

His wand was no where to be found, his head was spinning and his vision was still adjusting to the brightness of this new place. 'Where am I', he thought.

The stuffiness of the battlefield was replaced by the smell of grass, pine trees and lake water, the sound of birds and wind almost deafening. It couldn't be. Suddenly he remembered how he'd gotten there and started panicking. 'Where is he?'

Straight ahead at the edge of the lake, there stood the same man he was trying to hex not but a few minutes ago.

With his shirtsleeves rolled up and his hands clasped behind his back, the wizard turned his head to speak over his shoulder.

“You can come closer, I promise I won’t hurt you.”

He was hesitant, but Gellert knew he would be safe here. At least for now.

“What are we doing, Gellert?”

None of them dared to look at each other, instead they pinned their gaze towards the heavy clouded sky.

“Fighting for what we believe in. You must have known it would lead to this one day. The two of us against each other”

They spoke so quietly, you’d think the wind was blowing away their words.

“Would I be a fool if I told you I'd never thought of it? The idea of a future without you by my side seemed impossible.”

Silence.

“Do you remember the first day you brought me here?”

Albus smiled at the memory.

“How could I ever forget.”

It was true. He remembers the scrawny,auburn haired boy he used to be, desperate to impress his mysterious new neighbor who already knew all about literature and music and seemed completely dismissive towards him.

That was until he’d showed him the cabin by the lake. A small wooden shed magically hidden away from view, enlarged to fit all of his possessions that varied from books to a desk and later, a large overstuffed bed.

They had spent days in there, speaking of theories and aspirations and what would be.

Truth was, they were happy. Back when, in the blissfully ignorant bubble of their youth, words and ideas were powerless.

“I miss her too, you know. I will never forgive myself for what happened.”

The slight drizzle was transforming into what would soon be a powerful storm and there they were, old beyond their years, the shadows of the past still tormenting their memories.

“Don’t say that. Please, you saw where guilt brought us, leave it be.”

“I can’t. If I hadn’t talked you into making that blood pact, if only we could-”

This was getting out of hand, Dumledore had not counted on Gridelwald's cooperation.

“You didn’t talk me into anything. It was as much my decision as it was yours.” His hands were digging into Gellert’s forearms, making him face him.

The rain was now too loud for anything else that was said to be heard and they both made a run for it into the cabin.

Closing the door, Albus realized they left both their wands behind.

“There should be some dry wood over there, fetch it for me please.”

Gellert didn’t need to think twice before reaching out for the wood. It was unconsciously done. He looked around trying to take everything in. The papers on the desk, the unmade bed, the used cups on the table.

“You still come here?” He didn’t know why the thought of Albus coming back to their spot alone bothered him this much, after all he’s lived in Godric’s Hollow his whole life, why shouldn’t he come visit?

“Sometimes. When I miss the way things used to be. When I don’t wish to hide anymore.”

Gellert flinched at the words. 

Albus stood up from his knees, clothes still dripping but fire burning bright. He wiped his hands while he spoke.

“ It’s the truth. I’m too much of a coward to admit who I am. After all, that was what drove you away.”

The way he could say such hurtful things so calmly, as if he had accepted them a long time ago, made Gellert’s heart sting.

“I know things did not turn out the way we wanted them to, Al.”

And at that moment, the two of them sitting in front of the old fireplace, trying to warm themselves up, he let himself be deceived.

Right now, they were not two men fighting on different sides of a meaningless war, but the young, unsuspecting boys who fell in love under this very roof, back in 1899.

Out of the corner of his eyes he spotted the old turntable, dusty and probably not used in ages. Grabbing an equally forgotten, almost completely worn out disc, he dropped the rusty needle.

The sweet melody filled the room, struggling to be heard over the intense tapping of the rain against the glass windows.

“Merlin, Gellert. How can you do such things at a time like this? There is a war out there and we are the ones responsible for it!”

“There is no war in here, Albus. This is our private chapel, your words- not mine. Nothing can touch us in here, that’s what you said once.”

Reaching out his open palm in a silent invitation, Gellert Grindelwald looked nothing like the malicious, blood-craving wizard the Prophet loved to describe him as.

No, this was his Gellert, the man he loved more than anyone, alive or dead. The same man that used to hate staying awake past midnight, always dozing off on top of open books and unfinished manifestos. The same man that wrote sappy love letters to him every moment they spent apart, whether that was a few hours or days. How could that boy, that beautiful, beautiful boy, whose heart was bigger than his chest, have turned into- 

Now wasn't the time.

Staring fondly at the image before him, Albus took his hand.

Fingers linked, one hand resting on his former lover’s waist, foreheads touching and hair dripping down their faces, they swayed across the wooden floor.

Never uttering a word, secretly recalling memories of the times they had done this before, shocked at how their bodies still lined up perfectly- as if not but a day had passed since the last time they danced together.

The notes died out softly, leaving the gently rapping of the rain echoing through the walls.

Lifting up his chin, Gellert was met with a dazzling pair of blue eyes he knew only too well.

Albus’s gaze dropped to his lips, head tilting to the side and hovering centimeters in front of his mouth, waiting for any signs of resistance, as if he would ever dare to turn away.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Who is the villain in this story?

The kiss was slow, a mere brush of lips, allowing themselves to get acquainted with each other’s taste again.

It had been so long- too long- and now having Gellert between his arms, touching his hair and kissing his lips, it was almost overwhelming. How did they end up here? They used to be in love, sharing moments like this every minute of every day they spent together. It doesn’t matter now, he heard himself say. Albus was willing to savor anything the man would give him.

“Want to sit down?”, Gellert’s voice sounded distant in his ears, you’d think he was miles away. He lifted a hand to stroke his cheekbone and felt his breath catch at the way the other wizard leaned into his touch.

“Please.”

He felt ridiculous pleading no other than Grindelwald himself, his great nemesis and love of his miserable life to lay with him. Pushing the thought of what would the Prophet say should anyone walk in on them aside, they linked hands and sat on the old, musty bed.

He had missed the way Gellert’s breath hitched, the soft sounds he made and the tenderness of his voice.

He had missed the creaking bed and lumpy pillows, the creaking of the fire and the ringing in his ears.

He had missed touching the man, caressing his scars and feeling his skin.

Most of all he had missed who he was when it would be only the two of them, in the dark, under cold sheets, sharing secrets and speaking of the unspeakable.

Those where the memories he held close to his heart when the next morning came and he saw that same man being lifted unconscious by the two Scamander brothers.

Theseus, the eldest, nodded to Newt to let him know he could handle the situation on his own, leaving the youngest to deal with the Professor, who was now sitting in the corner with his head in his hands, shoulders shaking.

“I am not one to tell you how to feel, Professor. But I know this: muggles and wizards from this day on will get to grow old and see their children grow old, because of you.”

The man lifted his tearful, tired, blood-shot gaze and Newt shuddered at the sight.

That was the face of hurt, grief, regret and pure pain he saw that day.

The last day- for a long,long while- that Albus Dumbledore allowed anyone to see past the mindless smile and unbothered eyes. And at that moment, he swore to himself that he would do anything, come what may, to secure the safety of both the Wizarding and Muggle world, what ever the cost may be.

His heart, after all, was now locked inside a tower, along with the only man who had ever had the courage to love it.

**Author's Note:**

> Always keep in mind that I do this for fun and as a away of coping with reality, since shifting has not worked yet xxx


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